Alrighty then… Now that the bot (Huggy Bear) that beat the bot (Iron Soldier) that beat me (Malvolio) was shown losing in a little blurb on Comedy Central's BattleBots, I guess I can now safely describe the events that led to me being an observer very early on at BattleBots Treasure Island Spring 2001.

Thursday May 24th, approximately 1:15 AM. I am standing in line trying to get my radio out of impound for my upcoming fight with Iron Soldier, a stout east coast bot. The two teams I'm here with fight at approximately 12:15 and 12:45 ahead of me. I am alone with my thoughts and nerves when the Iron Soldier team shows up in line next to me. We shoot the breeze a little, just small talk, as we are adversaries just yet.

We get the word to take our bots and get into the queue for contestants ready to fight. We don't have our radio's yet, and the impound process seems to be evolving as we watch. We get in line and continue our mild conversation. We discuss past events, and I make the comment that "Something's breaking, him or me I don't know but something's going to get broke." I made this comment because of my experiences at Robotica being a little tentative when the gun sounds…

Malvolio is prepped and has been since before I left for San Diego. I feel confident because I feel I've worked out Mal's peccadillos. I feel confident despite the fact that Iron Soldier is obviously a well-built, solid bot. It's a wedge of sorts, with a horizontal saw in the rear, a big upward pointing claw/tooth in front, driven by some powerful wheel chair motors.

As I looked Iron Soldier over I was deciding on some tactics, as I'm sure my opponents were as well. Iron Soldier was low only in the front, and even then I felt Mal's Ti wedge front was lower. Iron Soldier also used pneumatic tires, and I decided that if I got Mal into a position with Iron Soldier behind him, I'd try to pop those tires with Malvolio's rear spikes. So my final strategy was to go in for an initial hit with the weapon, come out of my square full steam ahead and then assess the situation after. Not unlike breaking in pool. Then I planned to use the weapon, wedge and spikes, as opportunity allowed.

Just as the fight ahead of us was ending, we still didn't have our radios. I was now quite nervous. I kept telling my self that I'd been here before and to relax. It didn't help much but I do think my Robotica experience helped some. The crewbots sent in the fight behind us because one of the bots in the previous fight had my channel and there wasn't time to get me my radio and into the box. After the fight they moved ahead of us it was time to go into the box. The last time I'd been in the box was the previous November, with Jim Smentowski and Backlash in the Lightweight championship fight. It was as if it had been yesterday. The smells, the sounds, the heat, the adrenaline came rushing back. Only now it was my bot in the red square. It was me turning on the radio, and flipping the receiver and power switches on Malvolio. For some reason, and I believe this is the case with many competitors, I felt compelled to rush through the power up and remove safeties phase of pre-fight. Roy, the behind the scenes commandant of safety in the box told me to relax, that we weren't in a hurry. So I did. I made sure Malvolio was ready and walked out of the box and onto the RED platform.

I looked over at the Blue platform and my opponents looked as ready and determined as I felt nervous. This was the first day of combat, the fights were only two minutes long and no hazards were powered. It was just boto a boto. The referee pointed to the non-functional Christmas tree, counted down from three and it was on.

I immediately spun up Malvolio's weapon and hit full forward on the right stick. Mal jumped out of his square and it would appear that Iron Soldiers driver was of a like mind because Mal and Iron Soldier met in the middle of the box at a closing speed of probably close to 30 MPH. They both enjoyed a shuddering hit that left both bots briefly motionless. My method of using Malvolio's weapon was to release the switch turning it on just before impact so I wouldn't continue driving the weapon motor at stall. I couldn't tell if Iron Soldier had taken damage and he began to move. Once I took in the effect of the collision I hit the weapon again and decided to head for Iron Soldier's side. I noticed something odd about the weapon motion and released the weapon switch again. I just concentrated on driving for a moment and got under Iron Soldier a bit and was able to briefly carry him around. Iron Soldier had large tires and was able to drive off of Mal's wedge.

I then took a moment to look at my weapon. My ½" 6AL 4 Titanium spinning bar was BENT! Bent by about 30 degrees! I couldn't believe it, nor could I contemplate it any longer because Iron Soldier was getting into position behind me. Ah, the opportunity I was looking for. Iron Soldiers tires were directly behind me! I hit full reverse, but I didn't go straight in reverse. I did a turning semi circle backwards. Hmmm, must have lost traction on one side of my drive momentarily. I was now sideways to Iron Soldier and vulnerable so I drove forward to try to get into attack position again. But this time I didn't go straight forward I made a reverse motion to when I tried to back into Iron Soldier. I couldn't go straight in forward or reverse. I started to get a sinking feeling in my stomach. This seemed all too familiar.

I ended up in a position where I thought I could hit Iron Soldier while driving my semi-circle forward. So I hit forward and went for it. We hit but I bounced off and ran into the spike strip. Oh, No! I'd seen too many wedges get stuck under the spike strip and didn't like the looks of my situation. I hit full reverse but nothing happened. There was well over 30 seconds left in the fight and the last thing I wanted was to lose by KO. My drive wasn't working and Iron Soldier was now coming in with his saw. He put a cut into my brand new Raybotics sticker on one side. That Bastard! Then he came around the other side and put some small cuts in the rear armor. With ¼" Aluminum armor I wasn't worried about the saw cuts, but I really wanted off the spike strip! The only other thing I had to try was the weapon again. I hit the weapon. BANG, it hit the spike strip and moved me back a couple of inches. Ahhh, I'm free, I hit full reverse on the drive again. And again nothing! CRAP!!! My drive was broke again. I couldn't believe it. With all the problems I had at Robotica, and the upgrades I'd made, I never thought the drive would break again.

The ref started asking me if I was dead, I said NO! I'm still moving, and hit the weapon for emphasis. So with time running down in the fight I kept hitting the weapon and it kept banging into the spike strip while Iron Soldier kept trying to cut me up with his saw.

Finally the two minutes counted down and the fight was over. I went in to power down Malvolio and started to meet in the center of the box for the obvious judges decision. I was turned back and told to collect my robot and exit the box. They called the judges decision as we were walking down the red ramp.

I met the Iron Soldier guys and we briefly discussed the fight. They acknowledged some concern in the beginning when I was able to get Malvolio's wedge under them. Though the ending became clear soon enough.

When I got back to the pits I got the top armor off Mal and took a look at the actual damage. One tooth was broken off on the left side drive gear and the gear was spinning on the motor shaft. The hardened spring pin had sheared disabling that side's drive. I gave that gear to the Iron Soldier guys as a souvenir.

On the other side of the drive the hardened spring pin had sheared on the axle and the driven gear was spinning on the axle.

That was it, if it wasn't for two failed spring pins, I think I might have won my first fight.

Oh well, what can you do? There are no do-overs in BattleBots, and there's no crying… So I'll repair, upgrade, and improve and next time, we shall see...